Minus 50

From Environment Canada today: 

Wind chill warning for
City of Edmonton - St. Albert - Sherwood Park continued

Wind chill values of minus 40 to 50 developing tonight and lasting through Wednesday morning.

This is a warning that extreme wind chill conditions are imminent or occurring in these regions. Monitor weather conditions..Listen for updated statements.

Cold Arctic air has invaded much of Alberta and will bring temperatures of minus 31 to 39 overnight. These temperatures combined with winds of 15 to 20 km/h will give wind chills of minus 40 to 50 in the above mentioned regions overnight into Wednesday morning.

At these extreme wind chill values frostbite on exposed skin may occur in less than 10 minutes.

Two more sleeps,
And I am in BC
30 degrees warmer,
Makes a happier me.

-

Yuck, minus 50
Winter, why don't you bite me?
Kiss my frozen ass.

-

Two housebound children
Hey, where is Mommy? Behold:
Fetal position.

Cold Snap

The kind of cold
I feel in my toes
It freezes the hairs
Inside of my nose.

My fingers go numb
Even in mitts.
Minus thirty-seven
Is really the pits.

The wind makes my eyes water
The snow creaks under my feet,
I'm wearing 47 layers
In a vain attempt at heat.

If I were free and single
South and west I'd go
To the sunny Okanagan,
Where it's never 40 below.

But I love my husband,
And my children too,
Born and bred Albertans,
What else is there to do?

I have chosen to live here,
I have made it my home.
But I reserve the right, in the winter,
To bitch, complain and moan.

I loathe you, stupid winter!
I cannot stand you, snow!
I abhor the chilly, cutting winds,
That swirl and gust and blow.

I will detest you, winter,
Each and every day,
Until my friend, the spring arrives!
Sometime in late May.